Am I asexual?

Hey, this probably is a very stupid question, but I have been reading around this portal, and it is nice to see that everyone shares their thoughts freely, so I hope I can too.

I am almost 22 and I have had 3 boyfriends. However, I never had sex with any of them, even though I have always felt in love. With my first bf, we tried to do it, without any foreplay and anything, but it was painful and we stopped. I am currently going out with a guy for 9 months, and we are very close and I love him, but I just can’t have sex. At first I was just scared, with previous boyfriends I couldn’t even get undressed without feeling shame and do anything, with him I don’t feel that way. I love cuddling him, kissing occasionally, but I don’t feel like I want sex... I do go down on him often, cause I want to please him and I do realize it must be tough for him. He also tried going down on me but I feel nothing.

What does it mean? Am I frigid or asexual? Has anyone had these problems? Cause I feel like our relationship is not complete cause we don’t have sex...and I also really want to experience how it feels.

On my own I can masturbate, but with a shower for example, and I have no thoughts..