Share your PCOS struggles, we are not alone!
Well, I'm not as alone as I feel after reading through a few other PCOS threads! My story seems unique and just plain cruel but perhaps I'm not so alone. I'll share my story if you share your's!
MY FULL STORY: I'm 32 now, was diagnosed with PCOS at 18, and have all the pain in the ass symptoms you all have - chin hairs, hard to lose weight, thin head hair, the only place I DON'T want to thin my hair out lol and in my opinion the hardest: trouble conceiving. I was on and off the pill for many years and over time I started to realize, I don't really need to be "careful" (as in careful to NOT get pregnant before I wanted to) bc I hadn't up to this point and most women in their 20s surely would have with the routine me and my bc had going 😏. After years of "not being careful" and never getting pregnant I thought my fears from first diagnosis were being realized, I'd never be able to. Well, after the holidays this year, I missed my period. I thought nothing of it bc it has been normal in the past to go a couple months without one. My boobs were sore, I had ZERO energy, then I was throwing up at night out of no where. Weird. The first few symptoms could have been pms, but ive never been nauseous like that. Oh, and the heartburn? That was knew too. I could NOT believe my eyes when I took a pregnancy test and saw a positive. Although it was not "planned" I was so flipping excited, as you could imagine. I felt amazed, felt like a woman, felt relieved, felt EXCITED!!!! Flash forward three months (bc I could stay here and talk about how wonderful life was for me for that short period of time daydreaming about this life growing inside of me!). At my 12 week sonogram for my miracle baby, I was told she had severe hydranencephaly, basically when the brain stem does not develop and leaves a fluid sac where a brain should be. I cannot tell you how devastated we were. I will never experience pain like I did getting that news, or the pain I feel everyday for my little Miriam. The prognosis was not good, as this problem would put a huge strain on the rest of the baby's organs and would probably result in the baby's heart failure or further complications to my health. I lost my baby girl, my only pregnancy at 13 weeks. There were no answers to why this happened but it's completely unrelated to PCOS. It's like a double death sentence. Lightning strikes twice, sort of thing. Im so heartbroken bc I feel like it was such a miracle I got pregnant in the first place, just to endure this terrible tragedy? I don't get it. Now I'm left feeling that my one chance at pregnancy was a failure. On August 4th it'll be 5 months since the loss, and a few months since I've been "trying" with no luck. I've heard "well at least now u know you COULD get pregnant...." But it doesn't make this journey any easier. I fear that was it for me. All of our struggles hurt. It feels good to share them with people who might truly understand....
I'm listening....
Comment
Add Comment
Let's Glow!
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.
