Betrayed and hurting..

So I have posted before about my now Ex-fiancé and things have only gotten worse 😢 I spent almost two weeks in a tug of war with how I feel for him and what I should to to protect myself and move on. Two weeks ago we had a big blowout and the police were called and he was arrested. He’s on parole and probation and I found out yesterday that he violated his parole by being in contact with me. Which I thought that he could after the incident we had almost 2 years ago. Now he could possibly go to jail and it’s because he lied to parole signing paperwork that he would now be in contact with me but we started living together months before he signed. I never knew any of this. So getting back to the current matter, I found out in May that he had been cheating on me and that he has an attraction to transsexuals. Of course he denied everything but he was caught and it was all because he left his email open. That’s when I should have made plans to leave but my feelings run so deep for him I just wouldn’t do it. I know that sounds so stupid of me and I feel stupid writing it or saying it out loud but I do love him 😔😕 So right now I have a TRO ( temporary restraining order) until I get a final restraining order this upcoming week due to him attacking me on the highway driving home. I spent two weeks worried about his safety and him not having any clothes to wear since he only had what he was arrested in that I was trying to find ways to get him a change of clothes. I mean was in here stressing so bad that I’m not eating or sleeping properly. I lost my job behind the madness we been through and about to lose the apartment because he stopped payment on the rent. And yesterday he made arrangements with the police department to pick up his car, but what was the guy punch of it all is he had the woman he was cheating on me with come to pick up the car with the police. This bitch has a whole husband that she has been sneaking around on with my ex that she hasn’t left! Everything in was ready to risk it all and beat her ass! 😡 He found a whole new level to hurt me and it worked. So now I know that she will be at some if not all of our court dates. And I feel terrible, stupid and heartbroken 😞 I believed him when he said that he would never hurt me, I believed him when he told me that it was over and he never slept with her or any transsexuals.. I don’t even have control over how I feel right now. And no we do not have children and I know people will say that’s great and run but this hurts and I do want to run but I want to make it all go away also. I just don’t know anymore..