Am so very disappointed

Have 2 beautiful children, 18 & 19, finally found the man of my dreams, Miscarried Christmas eve, had pap, diagnosed with precancerous cells, had op, bled for a week, stopped, bled for another 3 plus weeks and stopped - period - hormones... Next cycle 3 days, apparently ovulated yesterday... sister in law is due in less than 2 weeks & my daughter is now 5 weeks pregnant... all so over whelming... 39 this year and my partner will be 38... time to give up? Are the heavens above trying to tell me something???