12 week appointment turned devastating

I went in for my 12 week appointment on Wednesday, so excited that I had made it to 12 weeks after a miscarriage in April at 6 weeks, only saw a fetal pole, never a heartbeat.

This pregnancy was different, I saw my growing baby, and heard the baby’s heartbeat on August 9th at 8w2d. On Wednesday, they tried to find the heartbeat with the doppler but couldn’t so had me go to the ultrasound room to hear it in case the doppler just wasn’t picking it up. There was no heartbeat and the baby was only measuring 10w2d. I had a d & c yesterday.

I am devastated. I don’t know what to think or feel and honestly at this point i’m feeling mostly anger. It’s just not fair. I had no symptoms or indications that something was wrong.

Just normal, very strong pregnancy symptoms.