Should I apologize? How can I communicate affectively to him ?
My bf is going through something separate from what I’m going to say. I asked bf to go out. He told me NO. He had no money nor anything to wear. His reasoning wouldn’t normally be an issue but I felt like there’s normally an excuse when I ask him out. Not always. But often. He says he doesn’t like spontaneous stuff yet he’d ask me out to spontaneous dates and I go without a question..
Anyway, I invited him over instead. When he came over we barely talked. I admit I acted out of anger even though I didn’t mean to hurt him. I just didn’t know how to process what I felt enough to discuss it. I really wanted to avoid it and tried but it bothered me. I didn’t want to argue by bringing it up. He went to sleep because he felt I was giving him the cold shoulder. I don’t deny I prolly was I just wish he showed more affection than he did considering I was already feeling a bit off.
He woke up and we got into a gigantic argument because he was leaving. He said he felt he came to see me for nothing. I eventually told him I feel he doesn’t want to be seen in public with me because there are always excuses when I ask him out. He felt I disregarded his feelings and told me he feels I think my feelings are more important than his. I told him I feel we are equal and both of our feelings should be addressed and I felt mine were disregarded. He felt I never acknowledged how he felt but He understood when I explained. He said I could’ve told him from the beginning what was wrong instead of treating him like shit. I agreed and he understood why I felt so upset. Things were going good then boom. I told him I was feeling that I wanted him to be more affectionate. I was trying to open up more and be more clear about how I felt. He gave me a massage and felt that was him being affectionate but that’s not what I was talking about. Anyways he got very upset again and said he’s done and I’m adding stress to his life. He told me he feels I always have an issue with him and Told me I’m trying to insult his intelligence. I don’t want us to be done I just want us to work things out. Please help.