This happened a while ago but its been in my head lately. Im not sure if its sexual assault or if its my fault entirely...

Anyway this is what happened

I had gotten kicked out of my house and it was late so i was trying to find some of my friends. I went to a park that was near my house and saw two of my friends (J+A) skateboarding with one of their friends. They said wassup and I met the other (K) and he seemed cool. They invited me to go somewhere to smoke and drink and I trusted (J+A) because I had known them for a while. We went to a different park and were smoking and drinking and I started getting drowsy and messed up really fast. (J) asked if I wanted to sleep at his house for the night and I said yes because I hadnt had a place to stay. We got there and I sat on his couch and passed out completely. I woke up and he was kissing me. I passed out again and woke up and he was having sex with me and saying he loves me. I was frozen...I dont know if I couldnt move because of panic or because of whatever we smoked but I tried telling him to stop and nothing came out. I layed there until I eventually passed out again and when I woke up he was getting dressed and telling me we had to leave. We left and he had to go pick up something so he told me to wait but I ran to my best friends house. I couldnt eat for days after and if I saw him I avoided him.

Before this we had always been strictly friends...no holding hands or touching

I had a boyfriend and he knew that cuz they were friends. I dont know why he did that....