Recovering...

This week has been intense. I was beyond excited to see my little bean for the first time on Tuesday. I waited so long for the day to come and I never imagined the doctor would tell me that the baby stopped growing at 8 weeks and I would have to decide what my next steps were going to be.

I decided to go for the D&C which was a scary choice for me, but I felt it was best since we were able to run tests to see if my fiancé and I had any genetic going on that we would need to prepare for. I had the procedure today and I’m still resting and recovering. My body is just so tired.

My emotions have been all over the place from excited, to scared, to devastated, to confused, to nervous. My fiancé has been pretty great through this whole process. Which has really helped me.

Being a mother is something I have wanted to be for as long as I can remember. I honestly never thought it would be this hard. We had a CP in July and now a missed miscarriage. I’m truly hoping we can start our family soon.

Just needed to put all that out there.