Honestly I just needed a place to voice my frustrations. It’s all my fault that I didn’t take my boyfriend serious when he told me our first couple of dates that he wasn’t interested in marriage. To be honest, we have a pretty big age gap (15 years) and I wasn’t really interested in a relationship with him. I thought we’d end up as friends with benefits because we were at different points in our lives, but after a month of hanging out he told me he loved me and we made it official.

Fast forward to now we have a great relationship. My family loves him and he often comes to family events now. The one topic that keeps coming up though is marriage. My family will ask when we’ll tie the knot, and the way he responds kind of annoys me. Maybe because I never thought I’d really be one of those people with a life partner and not a husband.

Anyway, his General response would be “I’m never getting married” or “Thats not in our future” and it kind of hurts me. I know he doesn’t want it, and I’ve come to somewhat accept that, but I think he could be a little more..... sensitive about it right? Idk, I just think it’s kind of embarrassing that my partner openly talks and jokes about not taking the next step when he knows I’m still coping with the whole no marriage idea. I wish I would’ve have taken our relationship serious in the beginning because I probably would have not moved for something serious otherwise. Stupid me.

We’ve had talks about this before, and he said he believes marriage is pointless because neither of us are religious.. his way of meeting in the middle was offering his last name to me, and suggesting buying a ring I could wear. But honestly I’d rather have nothing, than to “play” married, that’s just silly to me.

Now I see a lot of people in my life getting engaged and it sucks to know that if I continue to be with the man I love so much, and who treats me well, I’ll never get a chance to experience that.