14wks 3days and miserable as fuck

So to cut a long story short, since my FIL got sick in May and passed away in July, my MIL has been living with us.

My husband and I ‘celebrated’ our 1st wedding anniversary a week after his father passed away.

The next month, we find out i’m pregnant. We are delighted at that I should say.

Its announced that MIL will be staying with us for longer while she does some renovations to her home. Bear in mind she has another daughter and son-in-law and grandchild that live 20 mins away. But she stays with us full time.

She does the bare minimum to help around the house. She will insist on doing the washing, but no ironing. She cooks, but fries EVERYTHING. And her ‘cleaning up’ falls severely short of acceptable. Not once in the 5 months she has been here now has she cleaned the bathroom she alone uses. Infact she seems determined to do the opposite of everything that I do, despite my gentle correction at times.

Her grandchild gets childminded in our house, my husbands sister works a 4 day week and she also spends her day off here.

Now as for the renovations, my husband and I have built our own house. We had to delay living together after we got married because the house wasn’t just ready. We had been living together 6 months when they moved in with us. So currently out of the 10 months that we have spent of our married lives together, I have also spent 4.5 months living with her.

However with her renovations, she has copied every aspect of our home, down to the dressing table in her room, the new bed she ordered, the colours of her kitchen cupboards and worktop, the exact wall tiles we have, the addition of a velux window in the ceiling and down to the picture frames I have in the house. My husband sees nothing wrong with this and obviously is enabling her, having ordered the tiles and such for her.

I cannot stand to be in the house with her at the minute, I have just had my fill. And yet my husband thinks I’m the one being unreasonable.

I did my very best for the whole family while his father was sick, and I’m just at breaking point.

I usually have a fairly good relationship with my MIL, but I cannot stand to be in the same room as her at the minute.

My own parents are extremely unhappy about the arrangement, but have held off on saying anything because I have asked them not to cause any rows, but at this point, I’m so unhappy that I’m worried how it could affect the baby.