Do y'all think this is fair?

Question

With Christmas coming up we wanted to make a cost amount for our small family Christmas.
The members are-
Grandparents (OH mother and father)
Siblings/children(SIL, BIL, OH and I)
Nephews/grandsons (our LO and BIL&SIL 2 all boys from 4, 2, and 1)!
We usually spend waaaaaaay too much on the little Christmas. Like upwards of a thousand. Last year we had to bring 3 vehicles to transport to where we open presents. Definately a wake up call.
BIL, SIL, MIL & FIL can't afford to do that so we all want to agree to a price limit per person. 
Does this amount seem reasonable?

Answer

Why can’t everyone just buy what they can afford? Everyone’s adults, so what’s the point in dictating what someone else can spend? I mean, unless you don’t want to give more than you are getting, which isn’t exactly the spirit of Christmas. I buy what I can afford, if I get less than what I spent back, oh well. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

I think the prices being reasonable are relative to your situation. I would personally ditch this idea and just set an overall limit-like not spending more rhan $600 total for the small family Christmas. Also, if this was something you were planning on sharing with your whole family in hopes they would agree, unless they specifically asked you to do this, I wouldn't share this with them. I would personally be peeved if my daughter or sister or whoever tried to dictate how much I could spend on a family member. Taking into consideration that everybody's fiancial situation is different,  some members of your family could still have an issue with the amount per person/already budgeted their spending to a certain amount for the holiday season and it could come out to be much less than what you laid out. Just food for thought, money can be a really easy way to make a holiday event less special and more difficult for some. Hope this helps!

Answer

I totally get buying the little kids gifts but why not do a gift exchange with all of the adults. We do that in our family when money is tighter for one or all of us; or we’ll do white elephant type game but with good gifts and put a max of $15 per gift.

Answer

no more then $20. per person. or even $10. thats alot of money on that list and inwould nevrr spend that much!

Answer

Christmas shouldn't even be about who's spending what on who. It should be about the time you're getting to spend with one another.

Answer

I would discuss it with your family and come to a decision. In my family we do $50 per kid. We don’t do adults simply because we have around 20 children that come for Christmas.

Answer

This is not what christmas is about...Seems so stressful with the drama around giving.

Answer

Money shouldn’t be the focus IMO. Why not just have everyone do what they can afford? I’m sure everyone will appreciate the thought more ham the price tag, and if they don’t then I’d take them off my gift-giving list anyway 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

Just a suggestion—in my family, we buy for our kids, nieces, and nephews. The adults draw a name and only buy for one other adult (not including spouses, but out of my parents, brother, sister, and SIL.) It has made it so much easier, and we’re all fine with it being mostly about the kids.

Do y'all think this is fair?

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