Just having a really hard time...

I can’t get pregnant. It’s been 8 months of trying. Everything from preseed to opk’s to doctors appts to ‘not trying’. I have endometriosis and had surgery in January. Unfortunately the pain is back and almost even worse. It’s impossible to even think about getting intimate while I’m ovulating because the pain is SO bad 😭 the thing is I’m either supposed to get pregnant or go on artificial hormones to stop me from ovulating so slow down the endo. I’ve always wanted to be a mom and I want a baby so bad I don’t want to go on hormones to stop that from happening😞 sorry for the rant but I had to get this off my mind.