I keep thinking I’m more fat than I am?..

Alexa

I’m not sure if anyone here has been through this before, but it’s really been affecting me.

I lost 20 pounds over the past year, and I look the best I’ve looked in my whole life. I should be happy about it and I want to feel good, but I often find myself still interacting and displaying mannerisms like I did when I felt fat.

For example, I get very self-conscious putting my hair up because I think my face is very round, and sometimes I’ll look in the mirror after interacting with someone (and consciously worrying about how big I look) and I’m genuinely shocked that I look nothing like what I keep picturing in my head (I.e my jawline is present and not round?!).

The same happens when I sit, I try to hide my fat rolls even though they’re barely there, especially compared to how they were before! It’s almost like my mind hasn’t caught up with my body.

Another thing that happens is that I keep losing weight even when I have bad weeks where I don’t have time to workout or eat the best meals, and in my head I feel like I’m going to regain all of my weight in a week.. I see friends every few weeks and they always tell me I look thinner than before, which shocks me every time..

I really don’t know if this is something normal or if I should be worried about my mental state? I’ve struggled with body image for a long time but I’ve never felt such a discrepancy between how I feel mentally and how I look..

I’m not sure what responses I’m looking for but I needed to share with someone.. :(