Turned down for sex by husband

I tried to surprise my husband after I took a shower last night and called him into the bedroom when I was bent over the bed. He was very surprised so I kept with it and took his pants down and started to give him oral, but he didn’t get hard whatsoever and told me he appreciates the “assault “ but he needed time to prepare himself and got dressed and left the room. Now I feel like an idiot and undesirable. We only have sex once a month as it is and I was trying to spice things up. Failed miserably apparently. 😭