Hurts To Finger

Ok so hi... Uh help? It honestly hurts when I try to finger myself, I don't know if it's because my vagina is to small or what but what I do know is it hurts. Ironically it doesn't hurt when I use other things as a substitute, like the non-marker end of a Sharpie.... Listen don't judge me ok? Im desperate but besides that what do you think I should do? How do I relax enough to where it doesn't hurt, how do I find my most sensitive spots and how do I have the best orgasms, because lately they have been pretty meh.