I'm so disappointed in myself. Dissapointed and ashamed of myself.

I've been having a very tough few weeks and have felt myself sinking lower and lower. Then tonight, for the first time in 10 years, I cut. I have not felt this depressed, this lonely and helpless in so long.

That familiar feeling of selecting the poor piece of crockery to be smashed, to finding the perfect piece... It took away the pain, for a short while.

But now I'm just lying in my bed, legs stinging from the cuts, crying because of top of how bad I felt, I now feel dissapointed that I gave in after so long.