Am I the only one?
I'm probably not the only one but sometimes it feels like it. I got pregnant at 19. Our daughter is now 3, we're engaged and just in a better place. I want another baby.
But everytime I think of having a baby, I just get sad. Because my whole experience the first go wasn't what I ever pictured. My family wasn't excited for me, I moved far from home to a new state. It was just me and my now fiance . Like I didnt have anyone to enjoy the pregnancy with like my fiance at the time didnt make me feel like he was excited about it. That's all I wanted the whole time was someone to be excited with me. I didn't even get to take maternity pictures or have a proper shower. I dont even have decent newborn pictures. My whole life I dreamed/planned of having a baby obviously when I was a little older. All the things I'd do and how i would announce it. But i didnt get any of that and now that i want another baby i just feel like it will be the same thing over again. Which i know it won't but still this dread fills me. I've had a few times where I thought I was pregnant again and I would panic/cry because what if my fiance wasn't excited (which I know he would but obviously my brains an ass)
This is a really dumb rant. But I just want a happy pregnancy this time, I dont want to be miserable again.
P.s just crying while trying to get the thoughts out because I'm an emotional mess per usual
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.