Panic attack during sex

I was raped by my ex partner about two months ago and since I’ve been good friends with my ex-fiancé since we split over a year ago I’ve recently moved in as his room mate. We decided to hook up and because it was the first time I’d had sex since being raped I had a panic attack. Full on body trembling, unable to breathe and started crying. Whilst his penis was inside me and I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to look at him again. It’s awful. So embarrassing 😫😭