Depression on my own birthday

Tomorrow I’ll be 26 and I thought this year was going to be different since I’ve made new friends, I’m with my daughter who is 16 months and husband.m, but I can’t help it. Since I have memory my birthday I’m always sad, feel lonely doesn’t matter who is with me. For the first time in forever I will be working that day and it was all good until today.

I want this feeling go away, I feel sad for no reason, feel lonely and honestly I don’t want to tell anyone because I know they will think I’m exaggerating or something and honestly the only thing I want to do it’s not to feel this way.

When I was a kid my mom never “let me” celebrate because we didn’t have the money or people to celebrate it and now that I have it’s not like I that feels go away.

I just wanted to let this feelings and thoughts get out since I feel like I don’t have to who talk about it.