I’m a drinker. A social drinker. I love wine and sweet fruity drinks. Tonight I’m unsure if to stay away or to indulge but I’m mostly choosing the former.

On Christmas <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.eve">Eve</a> my periods should have come.

Something happened but nothing as per usual. I never miss. I usually experience my periods for 5-8 days painful and very heavy bleeding but not this time. Something showed up a moment, brief, of pinkish discharge ( as per usual a sign when my periods arrive) the pre menstrual cramps and mild diarrhea came and that was it. It’s as if the diarrhea replaced the bleeding.

Boxing Day, Dec 26th I couldn’t smell food. I hardly ate lunch and the cramps and mild diarrhea continued.

No bleeding yet. I wondered how come my lining was not shedding.

On the night of the 29th I took a pregnancy test my man bought for me. There were two lines within the first minute the first dark and the second the faintest thing. I was so skeptical

I couldn’t watch it dead on.

It tested positive according to my obgyn whom I sent a photo to in shock disbelief

and seeking confirmation.

Tonight I’m still not certain I’ve got a little human, a miracle I knew I wanted ever since I knew myself and one that we’ve been trying for since last year.

Tonight I’m drinking coffee mixed w hot chocolate. Like I said I am a social drinker so I’m out at a family New Years Lime/ party and everyone is drinking drinks I’d usually enjoy, drinks I’m currently craving and I’m happy here taking every precaution because I’m hopeful and with a little human.

I needed someone to talk to cause as you guys know it’s not the time to make any announcements to anyone really... let’s keep this between the 4 of us... me, my man, our God and you.

Happy new year!