How do you do it?

Question

How do you ladies know it’s love? True love? Puppy love? Real? Fake? Lust? All the things... I’m sitting here after making breakfast for my youngest, (I have a two boys: 8 & 3) and reading the most beautiful, inspiring post! 
I’m not one to deal with a man’s crap, which is probably why I’m not married, but I always wanted to be “married” and have one little Family... maybe I’m just stubborn, or don’t want to “settle?” 
I don’t mean to come off as a b*tch or belittling... but when times get tough... how do you get through it, without throwing it all away?

Answer

It is hard sometimes. Honestly,  there have been times where our vows were probably what kept us together. The thing is...falling in love is not a choice.  Staying together, working through the problems, loving each other despite the faults and shortcomings...all of that IS a choice.

Answer

Honestly, it’s more about the commitment than the love. Love comes and goes and as much as we want to romanticize wedded bliss and living happily ever after it just doesn’t work like that. A marriage is a relationship that just starts out with love/lust etc and matures into a partnership between two people who are committed to each other and being together for the rest of their lives. Love is great but unless you also build a strong foundation the love won’t sustain a long term marriage. It’s super important to know what you want and what qualify as deal breakers for you and then you’re right to not settle!

Answer

You literally just hold on. There’s nothing more to do. When I decided to say yes to marrying my now husband I knew I was either all in or all out. We were young and dumb and here we are still married. I found a partner who is so far from perfect, but he holds on to me and my son and he tried so hard. But girl, I know exactly what you mean. I don’t know if you believe in God, but it might help to relax and know He has a plan for you and it will come in His time. Sometimes relinquishing control helps to realize the bigger picture.

Answer

Marriage is a choice. Truest thing of life.

Answer

For me and my husband, it's hard work sometimes. I've always wanted a fairytale kinda love, but honestly that's just not me. We both can be selfish individuals, or want to be left alone doing our own thing, and other times we're glued to each other like when we married 10 yrs ago. It's all about finding a balance and both deciding if we really want each other, showing our true true selves.
My husband is verrrrry reserved with everyone on this planet lol, but with me and my son, he shows us his funny, caring, giving, silly self. That's how I know my husband wants our marriage, he's an open book with us. Also our marriage has been through a lot of ups and downs, and somethings that made us want to give up, but us working through it and become closer together is what shows me it's real.

Answer

Has to be the right person. Someone who is willing to work with you through anything and everything and not just the good.

How do you do it?

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