C section and breastfeeding- please help

I'm the biggest supporter of breastfeeding. I just found out that I am diabetic and my doctor is looking into c section for me due to baby's size. Totally not my birth plan :( 
I feel so heartbroken 
I'm scared that by having a c section I won't be able to breast feed? That I'd be so drugged or tired and they'll introduce a bottle to baby. I really want skin to skin bonding time with baby..
How is recovery after c section? I don't wanna loose the special bond with my first born :( 
Since it will be a big baby can I ask to get induced so he's not as big and attempt a vaginal? 
Thank you for the people who respond😘

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