Hi everyone

What makes a man strong to you? Have you experienced a weak man and if so what made him weak?

My boyfriend is emotionally very available, loving, kind, caring, very sweet. We are on the same wavelength and are the masters of communication despite our long distance relationship.

He however, insists he isn’t a strong person and this has concerned me too, whether or not he’d crumble under immense pressure during difficulties in a marriage or not. He isn’t a stereotypical manly man. He isn’t afraid to cry and express emotion which to me IS strong. I told him that he isn’t weak for showing his emotions. He has anxiety and depression and views that as a weakness too. He overthinks everything and feels his social anxiety makes him weak. I told him a lot of men worry and overthink but don’t show it for fear of looking weak from being emotional. Instead they hold it in and suffer longer for it and to me he’s stronger than men who do that.

He just recently made the big decision to move countries for me which he has been scared to do, but he’s decided to do that for me. My parents are upset at him right now because he took so long to decide on the move and they felt he strung me along with his indecision. But he told me he wanted to come over to speak to them face to face to explain everything, and my dad is a pretty scary “manly man”. He isn’t assertive or self confident, but I feel he has very tough skin, he admits this due to years of being bullied. I could literally say anything to him and he’d take it and try to improve on it, or if he does get defensive he doesn’t shut down he just states his side and we end up communicating through it and getting closer for it. I’m just scared I suppose, that he isn’t strong enough to handle things in life like a stereotypical “manly man” which my parents say I deserve. He’d literally do anything for me and he’s so wonderful in virtually every other way and I’m scared to lose him, I see my future with him and can’t imagine having the level of trust and happiness I have with him with someone else, but I also get worries or anxieties I suppose about his strength. His own mother told me he wasn’t strong enough to make a decision on moving countries for me but he has.

And standing up to my parents takes big balls i think. He also isn’t afraid to look silly. He danced at my uncles wedding where he knew nobody just to get me to dance because I was embarrassed to. When he’s about to leave for another 6 months I sob to him but he stays strong and tries to cheer me up and won’t cry until he has to say goodbye at the airport. He’s good with money, a big kid but level headed in important ways. his dad had a mental breakdown a few years ago which really affected him. He got sent away to a hospital and everything and he says his dad was incredibly strong and assertive so it was a huge shock. This worries me too I suppose. Like he isn’t one to complain to management like my dad would or be loud. He hates mechanics because he feels men would judge him, doesntgo to the bathroom at work if he might bump into someone and have to make small talk. What do you think? Does this sound weak to you? What makes a man strong to you?