TTC after repeat loses and you’re friends get pregnant?

I’ve been TTC for months. Miscarriage in August. So had to heal for months then tried again. Last month ended in a chemical pregnancy. And then being married to soldier 😭 So I’m out for months now being apart. Both my best friends are trying. One just started and just got a positive. I am so happy for her don’t get me wrong! But feel so sad and bummed out for myself. And the other has faints so she may also develop into a positive. And I should be there too but I’m not. And this month didn’t happen. Does anyone else ever feel like this? Pure happiness for your friends but so heartbroken it hasn’t happened for you?