I have done soooo much horrible things. When I was younger I never thought about how the younger me would want to settle down and have a family & be married. All the old me could think about was partying, sex, drinking.

I really fucked my body up. I got on the depo shot at 16, and my periods were normal but of course I wasn’t thinking about it. The younger me was happy that I no longer had periods 😭 was on the shot for a year, and got off of it for about 2.5 years and here I am. Everything is jacked up. I was messing around with a few guys because I had low self esteem and they made me feel good about myself. I ended up getting herpes, chlamydia, AND gonorrhea.

This was in 2015, and I know it was because I met my ex-husband that year and we ended up getting divorced nov. 2016, so that’s a whole year of not being treated. Wanna know how I found it? The new guy I’m with (we have been together for almost 3 years now) ended up getting the symptoms and went to get checked out. HOW EMBARRASSING. &&& I had ZERO symptoms and still continue to have ZERO symptoms. The insurance I have now will only pay for a check up and won’t pay for anything to do with fertility.

But I’m glad he did or else I would not have gotten treated. Then come to find out my LAST doctors appointment, the Dr. really belives I have PCOS or endometriosis and I’m not taking the news so well. I’m just a big ball of F up’s with no one to blame but myself. I just want to believe that everything is okay but it’s not. I see all the miracles on here but I always put myself down and say well they might have been diagnosed with PCOS or Endometriosis but they don’t have a freaking a STD that most likely scarred their tubing making it even more impossible. I just wish I could kick my old self in the face.

I know there’s a lot of young girls on here and I really don’t want anyone to go through what I’m going through. Here’s my life advice, take it as you will. Because Every action has a reaction and I’m PAYING for it everyday.

RULE #1: STD checkups should be mandatory for each person you decide to be with/mess with. It isn’t nasty and it’s completely normal to do so. I thought I would be considered a nasty azz person but now look at me. Just don’t.

RULE #2: DONT have sex with people you don’t know without a condom. Idc if it “feels” better. You’ll thank yourself later

Rule #3. THINK. THINK. THINK. Stop living in the moment and understand the things you’re doing is going to effect you later on in life.

Judge me as you will. But just know I’m judging myself forever and ever as long as I am on this earth.