How did you know you wanted kids?

Question

I’ve always known I was going to have children and be a mom one day. My husband and I always talked about “our kids” in the future sense. Now that we are discussing having a baby, I’m terrified and unsure if having kids is for me. I’ve heard the “I’ve never met someone who regretted having their kids” “it’s the most amazing thing in the world” “it’s hard but rewarding”- but I just don’t know- I think I like our life the way it is right now. I’m so confused because these feelings conflict with everything I used to feel about becoming a mother.

Answer

So I will say I was very much on the fence about kids. When I was single I wants to marry a divorced or widowed man and be a step mom... if that wasn’t an option I wanted to adopt. Basically I have always wanted to take someone who needed love and give them more of it. Annnnnd then I married the most amazing man in the world who really wanted his own children.... annnnd here I am 15 week pregnant. 
I cried a lot before we started trying, we fought a lot, I didn’t feel that hole in my life that people say they want to fill with a child.  He didn’t see a purpose to life without children. So we agreed to try, and then the thing that no one told me about happened- first time we tried- bam pregnant! (Apparently it’s a trend in my family- thanks for not warning me!!) 
The first trimester was awful, I was depressed, thought seriously about an abortion, pretty sure it broke my husband’s heart to see me in such agony, but we got through it! I’m excited to be a mom now that I’m through the worst of it (still terrified about the new born stage, and postpartum depression but we’ll get through that too).
But the long story short- I never really knew I wanted to be a mom- in fact I went through times when I knew I didn’t want to be a mom! But I’m getting ready now and we are definitely adopting out next child- bc I sure as hell am not doing this again 😂

Answer

No need to rush it! My husband knew he wanted kids but wasn’t ready to actually do it for a while. Now we have a 2.5 yo and one on the way. He is super excited about the second one where as I’ve been super nervous aboht having two!

Answer

I think how you’re feeling is natural. Having a baby will change your life- forever, and the idea of that can be very intimidating and overwhelming. I don’t think that anyone is ever truly ‘ready’, bc no matter how much you prepare yourself, parenthood is a very humbling, life altering experience.
My suggestion to you is to make a list of all of the things you want to see and do before you have a baby. Kind of like a pre-baby bucket list. Plan a vacation with your hubby, or fully relish getting actual sleep 😂 (bc you will never rest again the same way, trust me). Be selfish and indulge in things you may not consider doing as a parent, such as going to fancy restaurants, going to see a movie on a random weeknight, (for my hubby and I it was going to Hawaii, and me skydiving-which I couldn’t fathom doing now  bc I wouldn’t want to needlessly make my children motherless should something go wrong).
Making the actual decision to be a parent can be scary and exciting, but only you know how you are feeling and if it is something you both truly want- which it sounds like you do. It’s a good thing that you are being so proactive, but don’t  overthink it all either, bc anytime you do that you will psyche yourself out of it. Good luck to you, everything will be ok 😊❤️

Answer

You can always hold off another 6 months to a year. I never knew how much I’d love being a mom until I became one. It’s funny how it worked out, I told my husband I didn’t want children and that I was fine with the way things were. Then one day it clicked and I had this urge to have a child. My husband agreed and said he felt the same. Little did we know the night we “tried” we were already pregnant. I tested 3-4 days later because I felt different. I was peeing a lot and super hungry. I got a positive and I was like wow! Amazing that was super fast. I obviously didn’t know how TTC worked haha. So I guess you can say my son was planned/unplanned. Not sure. But I never regretted having him. He’s going to be 2 in May and he will be getting a sister then as well! I’m due in 10 weeks. I am so glad that I decided to jump into it or should I say I’m happy it happened (accidentally). It was the best thing ever to happen besides meeting my husband and getting married. You’ll never feel ready, per se. There’s nothing wrong with waiting and thinking on it a bit more though.

How did you know you wanted kids?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products