For as long as I can remember, I have had an issue with my body. Whether that be my arms being jiggly, my thighs growing 2 times their normal size when I sit down, or my stomach not looking right from where I saw it, it was always something.

Over the past few months, after running almost 5 miles a day and rucking 40 pounds for 2 1/2 miles, I have come to understand that my body is not something that deserves harm or hate. It is a machine and it does incredible things for me. It has put up with countless broken bones, plebe boxing classes and 5am PT rotations, all before the age of 18. It has held up through everything and I am so upset with myself that I hated my body for so long. For so long it was starved and beaten by the one inhabiting it. One day I told myself that I had enough. I got help and although it took years to finally feel okay in my own skin, years of different rehab centers, I am so thankful I did. I can’t finally eat without regret and I run without it being a punishment.

While I still have a long way to go with the amount of muscle I want and the proper requirements for my line of work, I understand that it will take time and that is nothing to punish myself for.

After my long struggle, I can finally say I am out on the other side. I have learned to love this body because it isn’t suppose to be model thin, it is suppose to be healthy. It is the body that’s muscles got me into USMA, it is the body that is able to take so much and still prevail, it is the body that is prefect just the way it is with being healthy. It is my body.

To my younger self who thought you would never make it to the place you wanted to be because of you’re uncooperative body and mind... you ship to CBT in July, you graduated the top of your class 6 months before graduation and you got a 300 on your PT test this morning. You did it.

-Candidate (and hopefully soon Cadet) S.

USMA Class of 2023