So my ex and I were together for 4 years. The relationship had it’s up and downs. We went through some pretty serious stuff in the beginning of our relationship. His mom was sick and we became her caretakers.

About a year into the relationship I discovered that my ex had an issue with being faithful. But I chose to stay with him because I thought that was how he was dealing with the fact that he was pretty much watching his mom die every day. But trust me, I know. I chose to stay.

One day after he and I were intimate, there was a burning sensation followed by itching and then bumps. I told him something wasn’t right as I had never experienced anything like that before. He told me something was going on with him too so we went to the dr. Turns out it was HSV2. Now I’m not sure if he had it before and just didn’t tell me. Or if he picked it up from when he was cheating on me. Doesn’t really matter because either way, I ended up with it.

I felt disgusting. I felt horrible about myself. I felt damaged and defective. But he assured me, “we’ll work through this together”. So of course my confidence was low and again, even though I was so angry at him. I stayed.

He cheated a couple times after that, claiming that it was just “emotional” and nothing physical. The trust between us was broken. But I felt like I had no other choice. I thought to myself “whose going to want me after what he’s done to me?”. I stayed.

Things got better. He ended up proposing but then 7 days later, we lost his mom. It was horrible but yet we managed to continue with our lives as she would want us to.

We got a house, started to plan the wedding. And then one day we went out to brunch and on our way home he just ended it. No warning signs. No explanations. Just ended it.

I’m finally staring to get back up on my own two feet but it’s really hard because now I’m left with questions. I honestly don’t know how to start dating again because of HSV. Do I date someone with it? Do I date someone without it? When do you tell someone?

I need support and advice on this whole new journey.