I told my ex I couldn’t continue our relationship because of how much damage we’ve caused eachother. That there was too much toxicity and I couldn’t move on because he did horrible things to me. He tried manipulating the whole conversation around and said I was the instigator from day 1 of our relationship and “played” him for the 3 years we were together. He told me he’s never hated anyone before in his entire life and started yelling at me over the phone, berating me, and used my past trauma (sexual assault from high school) against me to justify his hatred for me. He disrespected my body. He raped me months ago, he told me he never did because I “let him mess around with me in the beginning”. He knew what he did to me at the time. I was telling him wait and stop several times but he never listened to me. He belittled me and my body and said my body “ain’t shit” and he’s “had better”.

We’ve been trying to fix ourselves for the sake of our relationship since the beginning of 2019. This was the last conversation we had. I don’t know how to cope and I feel emotionally drained. I won’t ever know how to cope knowing this was our last conversation. (He’s the white chat and I’m the grey chat)

edit: he called me to me he loves me and “what’s the game plan” and I’m so scared to say anything wrong

wondering

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