So uh, I've kinda known/thought I was asexual before knowing about LGBTQIA. I've always felt blah at the idea of sex, and I never found anyone "attractive" in middle or high school. I've never felt horny or had any urge to have sex.

I'm panromantic, meaning I don't care about gender and believe I can fall in love with anyone. I've had crushes on people's personalities(if that makes sense), but it was never about their face, body, or gender.

Taking both of these into acount, I've been reading romance novels and comics as of late, because I love the idea of love and have a big squishy heart. However, when there is a sex scene, I get what I assume is "turned on"? It can be between any gender, any kind of people, and BAM. But, as soon as I try to think of myself having sex, or myself in any risqué situation, it's immediately off.

What's happening? What is this?

I've looked at countless amounts of ace labels, but I can't think of or find anything to describe it. When I first learned asexuality was a thing, I adopted the label as it gave me solace that I wasn't insane, that there were others like me. But now I don't know what I am anymore again, and that's kinda terrifying. For now, I suppose I'm a grey-ace, but I feel that doesn't define me(as its not really attraction?) and was wondering if anyone could help me?