Carrier testing

How many of you have done/ did not do carrier testing? And if you did it did you do it during pregnancy or before getting pregnant. I’m almost 21 weeks. My 20 week scan was perfect. I am 39 years old and have a history of miscarriage. We met with a genetic counselor last week. I would like to do the testing bc say I am a carrier for something and my husband is too, we than have a 25 percent chance of passing it down to baby and knowing this info can help us prepare after birth. Whereas if we don’t know this now, I feel like we don’t have control. My husband however doesn’t want to do it he doesn’t feel it’s necessary and will cause me more anxiety especially bc I’ve been pretty anxious already given my history. If he won’t do it my hands are tied bc me doing it and coming back with something won’t mean anything unless he gets tested also but if I test and everything is normal than at least my mind is at ease. Not sure what to do.