11 months ttc

Pretty sure af is slowly starting. I'm so upset right now and I don't know what to do. We conceived before without trying and I ended up having the abortion pill because we weren't ready. My doctor said I shouldn't have any issues. I'm at my breaking point and feel like since I didn't go through with the previous one that I'm being punished and it will never happen. Every month when af shows I get into a deep depression and I'm not sure how to handle this anymore. Any advice or encouraging words would be great. Thank you.