Doll or not?? Long post...

Question

Ok mamas and mamas to be I need some input here!!! After we found out that I was pregnant with baby number two I started thinking about what I may need to do to help my son transition with this huge change in his life. My Son is a HUGE mama's boy and gets so jealous when I hold any other baby no matter the age. He starts to cry and wriggle out of the arms of daddy's arms and gets worse until I finally am holding him in my arms again. He is only 19 months old. I mentioned to my DH that I wanted to get my son a real life baby doll to help him to transition to being a big brother. I have heard of moms Who pretend to nurse with the doll in front of their toddler and get them used to the whole idea. I want the doll to help him to be gentle with baby #2 and holding baby softly and not hurting his little sibling. My nephew is super rough with his little brother and had dropped him on purpose because he was so jealous. Nephew also pinches his little baby brother and is super mean to baby. So this has made me super nervous. He never had a transition before having brother show up!! My in laws are completely AGAINST me getting my son a doll or something to help with this transition and said that my nephew turned out just fine. (They are super red neck and rough and tough and my FIL is afraid my son will become too femanine) My father in law pulled my DH aside and was pleading with him to not allow me to get my DS a boy doll. They said that I should just be around lots of babies and stuff before baby is born. That babies adjust just fine and not to worry about it at all. I am not at all opposed to spending time with other mothers with babies and holding them and all that jazz. The issue is the babies are not in our home and in our routine and around his comfort area. Plus this is my child and I should be able to do what I want in raising my son the way I want. I feel like I am not going to be able to do what I want because my in laws feel like they need to have all input in my family. So this is a huge issue that I am trying to fight. Is there any suggestions as to how to work through this? Any Articles that will support my desire for my DS? Any testimonials of doing this in your own home? I plan to nurse baby #2 and need the support from my family and would like to have my son be a little more familiar with the act of it. Anything will help mammas!!!!! Thank you in advance!!

Answer

I assure you the doll would be a very good idea to introduce to your son, but make sure you make this a fun and nurturing time for both of you example: when I was giving a bath to my son I made him give his baby a bath as well" I talk a lot about feelings like : baby really likes his bath" you are such a big brother thank you ! When I was changing my sons diaper I did the same now.... Let'st schange baby etc I hope this helps

Answer

I would definitely suggest getting a doll or even just a stuffed animal! My oldest (now four) has always been a rough child he is special needs & when we found out we were expecting we knew we needed to intervene before baby came we bought a baby doll set with a cradle & high chair & played all the time with it when the second was born my oldest was 2 & loved his brother he even learned to rock the cradle with him in it ❤️ we are currently expecting baby #3 & have bought both our boys new sets to help teach them about the baby soon to come it seems to help ease the transition

Answer

It sounds like you think having a doll is best for your child's development. Trust your instincts. Your family isn't raising your child, you are. Setting ground rules for him and having a tangible item to model and have him physically rehearse is great for his cognitive development.

It's never ok to harm a baby, you are being proactive about having that stop with your immediate family.

Good luck

Answer

I say get the doll because not only will it help him get used to you having another baby, but it will teach him the do's and don't's

Answer

I bought my son a doll. It looked like a pirate but we called it his baby. He took it everywhere for a while.

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I would definitely get the doll. He is your son and don't let others interfere with your parenting. A doll is not going to make your son more feminine. He needs to get used to the idea of another baby being in his life and this is great way to do it.

My older sister was so jealous when I was born (we're 3 years 3 months apart) she did terrible things to me. She poured pepper in my eyes and mouth when I was about 3 months old (I hate peeper to this very day...lol). Not to scare you with my story but my point being that my mom regretted that she didn't better prepare my sister for my arrival.

I'll be having baby girl #2 when my daughter is 3 and a half. I'm nervous of how she is going to react. This will be such a huge change and a major transition for all of us especially her. We are trying to prepare her as much as possible. She too is a mama's girl and we are super close and bonded so I think it is going to be really tough on her when the baby is born. But I'm definitely going to include her in everything I do with the baby. My daughter likes to help so I'm hoping to include her by having her help doing things for the baby and with mommy.

Good luck!

Answer

Defiantly get a doll. It will help a bunch... Hopefully 😉

Doll or not?? Long post...

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