Test for HIV first appointment

I'm 25 and 9 weeks pregnant. I had a couple slip ups during my teenage years. At 16 years old I had unprotected sex with a guy of unknown status and shortly after got sick, plus had an enlarged lymph node in my groin. Ever since then I think I have HIV but always terrified to test. Overall I am healthy but I read it can take years for symptoms to show. I went to see a midwife this morning and told her my concerns. I got some labs done this morning and I'm terrified to find out my results. I've been living in fear and regret all these years. I don't know how to handle myself now....

My answer to K: In 9 years I never tested. I never slept with anyone else besides my husband. When we started talking I mentioned my concern about possible HIV and he disregarded it and thought I was crazy. I forced him to use a condom for the first 2 years until he said it was enough and he decided not to use condoms anymore regardless of my concern.