I’ve Been Trying For Months—Should I Start Worrying?

It's so true: Time seems to slow when you’re trying to conceive. You count the days until that all-important moment when you ovulate, consulting Glow obsessively, peeing on an ovulation test, even inspecting your discharge. When the big day (or week) comes, you get busy. And then you endure the dreaded two-week-wait for the day a pregnancy test may give you that coveted “positive” result....or it may not.

Repeat this dance month after month (and even year after year) and it gets really tiresome, really fast. It’s totally normal to feel frustrated when you’re trying to get pregnant—after all, when you’re ready, you’re ready! But when does that wait become a problem? How long does it actually take to get pregnant—and when should you start to worry?

As you probably know, your body goes through an intricate, elaborate dance of hormones, ovulation, and menstruation every single month. With such a tiny window for sperm to rendezvous with egg and produce a baby, it shouldn’t be surprising that for some couples it can take months, or even years, to conceive the traditional way. With so many factors at play, it’s pretty darn amazing that some people can get pregnant on the first go! 

As a general rule, if you’re under 35 and haven’t gotten pregnant after a year of trying, it’s a good idea to go see a doctor. The same goes for women who are over 35 and haven’t conceived after trying for six months. If you are 40 or above, you should only give yourself 3 months of trying naturally before heading in to an RE.

The fertility doc may use what’s called an antral follicle count ultrasound to see how many eggs your ovaries still have, called your “ovarian reserve.” It could be that after checking you and your partner out, your doctor will declare that your fertility is a-okay, and the delay in pregnancy is just a matter of random chance. (So keep at it!)

And if your doctor does find some physical barrier to conceiving, there’s no need to panic! Instead, think of it as an opportunity to consider your fertility options and start the next stage in your journey toward parenthood. Remember - knowledge is power. The earlier you know if there is a problem, the better.