We’re due our rainbow and I don’t know how I feel..

Hi all. We have 3 beautiful children ages 5,2 and a half and a soon to be 1yo. I said to my friend I had to test because I felt pregnant. I wasn’t expecting a positive (this was Saturday) and I’m not due on until tomorrow. We lost our baby last year at 10w 3 days pregnant. We was due in April and by the look of things we’ve conceived in April.. I’ve convinced myself we’ve been blessed with our rainbow baby by our angel baby... I’m happy don’t get me wrong. But I’m petrified of miscarriage again. I hated myself and my body. I still do. I failed so bad... I’m beginning to do less around the house because I don’t want to overstrain.. it scares me. Any help/tips/thoughts? Thanks x