Stuck in an endless cycle... is this PPD?
I need a place to rant, so if you keep reading past this sentence... bless your heart.
My LO is just about 5 months old. We moved to a new city about a month and a half ago.
Through that transition I also quit my job as a personal trainer and started working from home, still in fitness but from a computer instead of around people. I don’t have any friends here. And I don’t have any friends who are moms. My husband works 12-9:30 pm every week day and 7 am-2pm on Saturdays. I’m alone with my baby almost all the time.
I feel like I’m losing my mind. I have no desire to workout anymore, even though that’s been my passion and all of my schooling (I have 2 degrees in it for goodness sake). I was even competitive in lifting. I ended up letting my gym membership expire because I was going that infrequently. I don’t really stick with any of my old hobbies.
I honestly just feel like nothing I’m doing matters, is impactful, or has a purpose. I’m staying home all the time and I cant even fold a damn load of laundry. I feel lazy and irresponsible but at the same time I don’t know how to fit anything else in my day. I look back at how I used my time and don’t feel like I could have fit anything else in. It makes me so frustrated and angry.
I love my little guy SO much and really feel like we’ve bonded. I don’t think about hurting him or myself or anything like that. I’m just stuck in limbo and have no foreseeable way to get out. It sucks.
Let's Glow!
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.