I didn't relize how broken I truly am still.

Today all the pieces seem to come together but to then just fall apart again. Lately I've had no energy or desire to do much at all but I still manage to act like all is well. Today I felt numb or in a trance. I haven't felt that way in awhile or so i thought. I tired to ignore that numb feeling. It wasn't until I was alone, then all of sudden I couldn't keep it in. Deep down I knew I would break closer to our due date but that's still two months out.

Today I was reminded of the hurt that's still there. Today I found myself wondering what your kicks would have felt like. Wondering who you could have been. Today I crumbled.