I’ve been with my man for more than 5 1/2 years. We’ve lived together for 3? (Not sure exactly)

I mess around, and tell him I want a kid. However, don’t think I’m truly joking. I think I joke, cause I know he doesn’t want kids anytime soon; so I’m trying to put the idea in his head? Idk. I’ve even told him I’m getting off my birth control, multiple times. However, I’ve never. I also wouldn’t do it without him knowing. Sometimes he says he never wants kids, and I always tell him if that’s the truth, I’ve gotta leave him, and stop wasting my time. I want kids at some point in my life. For sure.

Sometimes I think I need to leave him, cause he’s financially unstable, and just needs to grow up?? Find priorities. Etc. I need to be #1, no ifs and or buts. He doesn’t want to go to college, okay- but think about your future. I told him he could get more money having an education. That’s not really an issue, but idk. Bothers me sometimes. So many people have told him that he needs to grow up, and do shit. His grandparents, and mom tell him how lucky he is to have me. Sometimes I feel like he doesn’t see what he has. He tells me to stop acting like his mom, but I have no choice, really. Otherwise nothing would get done. However, I have no idea what I’d do without him. LITERALLY NO IDEA. We’ve been through SO much. I love him, he loves me.

I’ve got a couple grand saved up, a 2016 car, payed off, heading back to school, and working full time. Am I crazy? Is it just baby fever? I have dreams about being pregnant. Reoccurring.