Need some pumping positivity & motivation!

I am having difficulty staying motivated to pump. I hate pumping SO much, and I can't bf cos my nipples are too large for her to latch onto (I still try and have seen a lactation consultant about it, she's just too little).

My supply has been low from the beginning, but at least at first there was the excitement of seeing progress and then when my milk finally came in it was amazing. I had 28 hours of labor before an emergency c section, so it took nearly a week for my supply to come in. Once it did, ounces every pumping session. Then nipple pain then clogged ducts and now.. almost nothing(I fixed the ducts by now). It doesnt matter if i pump for 10 minutes or 40, i struggle to produce even one ounce anymore.

I'm going to visit my lactation consultant this week about it, so it's not so much advice that I need. I need support. I absolutely hate being attached to the pump, but before it was worth it, because it meant my baby was getting nutritious food. But now, i hardly make enough in a day for even one of her feedings (I supplement with formula). And when I'm attached to the pump, that's less time and energy I could be spending bonding with her. I feel like a failure, and each session is just a reminder of that. There is no upside to continue pumping right now, but im only 4 wks pp and I was expecting to bf for 1 year, so I dont exactly want to give up.. except i really do.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? Any motivational viewpoints I'm failing to see?