Chemical pregnancy #2

Natalie • July 21 💚 Feb ’20 💙 March ‘18 💙 Dec ‘15 💙🧩 4 miscarriages 🌈
Suffering a chemical pregnancy - my 2nd.  Devastated.  Having a hard time being the rosey-cheeked Kindergarten teacher I'm supposed to
​be.  Cried quiet tears on and off all day today.  Last night really let it out.  Laying in bed now, as I've been doing since I got home from work.  DH is supportive but doesn't seem sad or phased at all - perhaps I'm misreading him, or it's the raging hormones - but I feel angry at him. don't know why. He's working late tonight so hopefully the anger passes after a good sleep.  Oh, I hope I can get a good sleep tonight.  
​To the doctor on Tuesday.  The frustrating part is that I'm not bleeding yet, but my BFPs have faded and now all my HPTs are reading negative.  Last cp, there was about 24 hours before I bled after my first bfn post BFP...I'm at the 24 hour mark now and no sign of bleeding, but I do have some heavy crampy aches.  Not even sure I want to TTC anymore.   I hate this.