Anxiety & baby shower

So I’m 31 weeks pregnant & soon to be planning my baby shower but... idk if I really want one :/ I was already struggling with anxiety before getting pregnant, on my first pregnancy appointment they told me my anxiety was going to get worse, & it did. This anxiety hits me out of no where even if I’m alone in my room. I’ve had more panic attacks during my pregnancy than through the 8 years I’ve dealt with anxiety. I agreed to have a baby shower cause I feel like I owe my boyfriend’s family that, & also my boyfriend. I don’t feel comfortable having one, the pressure is too much for me. Deep inside me I want one & wish I wasn’t struggling with it as I am but I know that the day off I’m going to be way too anxious to function or want to be there. We got most of the stuff for the baby, so the babyshower will be more as a party than getting the things we need. Any advice? I know to someone that isn’t struggling with anxiety this might not be a big deal like I’m making it seem, but to me it is & I have no one else to vent to that can understand me... TIA.