So I’m in quite a predicament and really unsure how I’ve allowed myself to get here.

I’ve been married now for 2 years. My husband and I got married when we were 21, and so many people have said we won’t last and now I’m scared that it’s true. When my husband proposed to me we had just found out that we were expecting and figured that was the logical thing to do. Sadly I ended up miscarrying at 11 weeks, but we decided that we would carry on with the wedding.

Over the passed few years it feels like my husband has given up on trying in our marriage. I rarely feel loved and desired. And we almost never have sex because he is scared I will get pregnant again and he wants to wait until we have a house purchased to have a child. So we just don’t have sex.

I love him so so much, but I feel myself slipping away and giving up because I don’t feel he cares for me

I’ve been working with this other man for a few years now and we’ve always just been friendly around the office and been “work friends”. Lately, he seems to be much more flirtatious. He will come up and blatantly flirt with me in front of people, and compliment me everyday. He will find reasons to come and visit at my desk etc. The past few weeks has gotten much more intense. He will come to me and play with my hair, and I will playfully push him off and he grabs my hands and lingers for a second and then stops... and the other day he started rubbing my neck and giving me a massage. I feel so conflicted. I am so attracted to this man I work with, but I made a commitment to be married. This other man gives me so much attention and is kind and asks about my day and if I’m alright and checks in on me as though he genuinely cares. Where as I come home to my husband who only talks about himself and his career, his wants and needs. He won’t even sleep with me when I am begging for it to feel close to him.

Now I find myself thinking of the man I work with even while I am at home and not at work. I check his social media to see pictures of him and day dream of being with him. But then I hate myself because I have vowed to love my husband. But how can I do that when I give him all of myself and never receive anything in return??

I don’t know how to stop this work flirtationship and frankly I’m not sure that I want to... yet all I want is for my husband to fight for me, but he won’t do that.

Please offer me any advice you have 😭😢💔