Asking relatives if they’ve had their flu shot/vaccinations?

Question

We’re expecting our first baby this fall, and a friend of mine asked me if we’re planning on checking with our family members/friends to see if everyone is up to date on vaccines and flu shots before the baby comes. (we both have extended “family” that aren’t blood related but have always been our fam, and we aren’t 100% sure if all their kids, adult kids and friends are up to date)
Obviously I want my baby to be safe and protected, but I worry about being one of those moms who literally post “rules” on the door of their hospital room telling people not to kiss their baby, to wash hands first, etc. 
You always hope people have the common sense to do so, but a part of me wonders if unfortunately not everyone would. I have a half brother who is 18, while I love him, he’s beyond spoiled (doesn’t know how to cook anything, has to be woken up by his mom for school, etc) and I honestly don’t think he would think to wash his hands before touching the baby. It just wouldn’t cross his mind, ya know.
Have other moms checked with family members to see if they’re all caught up on shots and such or is that a first time mom worry that honestly shouldn’t be brought up?

Answer

My kids aren’t around a ton of people. Unfortunately we don’t have a ton of family near but I am expecting twins this time so things will be different. 
Normally my in-laws know I require certain steps prior to them getting to see the new baby/babies but I have never expected a child/children right at the peak of flu season. Twins are naturally born preemies and their risk of infection is so much higher so I’m going to be more cautious. 
You can ask if they have had shots but they can always just lie. There is no way to make sure someone has had their vaccines. That’s the shorty part. Just pray your baby doesn’t get anything. 
Don’t let people kiss your little one on the head or hands. 
If someone is sniffling/coughing.... Bye! 
Someone looks generally unwell... Bye! 
Kind of the best I can do. Or be a hermit like I am 😂

Answer

I personally am not gonna do that. I know so many first time moms are extra about stuff like that bc they are nervous about everything when baby comes. What I do plan on doing is limiting the people who visit us to only immediate family and really close friends and after that keeping my baby in a carrier when we go out. I’m already planning on baby wearing for other reasons so I guess it’s just a bonus that no one can grab the baby😂. My baby is also gonna be exclusively breastfed so the worry about germs drops drastically. Idk but I don’t think moms should be so stressed out about germs! Just keep your baby close to you and both of you should (for the most part) be happy and healthy.

Answer

I am proud to be an overbearing, rule having mom. Here’s how I see it: I am my baby’s voice, their only advocate and their protector. If I don’t say something, he’s not going to be able to defend himself and let me just tell you now, common sense isn’t all that common. If you want things to be a certain way, you need to speak up or you’re going to sit there feeling sad while people touch your baby with dirty hands and kiss him/her. As for the vax thing, I only require people who are going to care for my child to have their TDAP. I’m not forcing anyone to get the flu shot. As for people’s kids, just ask. The measles outbreak we are experiencing in the US right now is no joke.

Answer

We told everyone they needed vaccines prior to baby delivery. Otherwise don’t expect to visit. 
MIL refused so she doesn’t hold baby. Her loss. 
We ask everyone to wash hands when they enter the house or before we handoff baby. 
Your baby your terms. Far too many horror stories not to be the baby advocate

Answer

I definitely will and have already started. I don’t care about how people feel about me protecting my newborn. Whooping cough and the flu can kill a tiny baby with no immune system. You do you, mumma. It’s your baby and you need to do why is right in your gut to protect him or her, now and for many years to come.

Answer

I’m still early along, but I’ve just casually mentioned it a few times. Anyone who has talked about coming to the hospital, I just told them it was the hospital’s policy that they have gotten their flu shot and tdap vaccine. Nobody has had a problem with it so far.

Answer

I don’t plan on asking about vaccinations. No one I know is against them. However I will ask that no one who is sick come over, and best believe I’ll be there at the door checking for sniffling noses and such, especially since due date is in October, and bc I know family will be excited to see her that they’ll just think, “oh it’s just a small cough, it can’t hurt and I’ll sanitize”. 🙅🏻‍♀️. It’ll also just be close family who we’ll let come to the hospital and home in the early months. Still, I will ask that no one kiss her or touch her face and will most likely have mittens on her.
Also I will definitely not allow any of the smokers to hold her 🙅🏻‍♀️ while she is still a newborn.
It may seem excessive to some but, 1, I caught a virus while pregnant with my first from someone who appeared to have a “small” cold” and it ended up doing some damage. My daughter is now 12 but has the understanding of a 2 year old (and her intellectual disability is only one among her other disabilities). It’s called CMV (Cytomegalovirus). 2, babies are defenseless and count on mama 100%. I, for one, have not taken any chances this pregnancy and that will not stop once baby is born.

Answer

I plan to keep my kids away from sick people, and home from public places during severe flu outbreaks, but telling other people what to do with their bodies is ridiculously overstepping.

Answer

Your baby will rely on you to keep him/her safe. Nothing else matters besides that. If people don’t want to do simple things that you ask of them in order to make sure your child is safe then they don’t get access. I’d rather have someone be offended because they lack common sense then put my child at risk.

Answer

Nope don’t plan to check on anyone’s vaccination status just planning on using common sense cleanliness habits. If they don’t know not to touch baby’s face or kiss him then I have no problem telling people, we also plan to have hand sanitizer readily available so anyone who wants to hold him can as long as they use it. Don’t plan on having him around anyone except parents and siblings for the first few weeks of his life. If someone is sick we will ask they not come over, if a parent is sick and visits us at hospital they will put on a mask and not hold baby.

Asking relatives if they’ve had their flu shot/vaccinations?

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