Long story short: Had my 2nd miscarriage back in September and I’m still not over it. The father is not supportive AT ALL. He went from not believing me, to believing me, and because I told him I was going to go to Hawaii (he lives out there) around my due date so we could do something for the baby, he went back to not believing me and came up with a BS excuse saying his family is going to the there the EXACT dates that I planned on being there. I wasn’t going to fly 5,000 miles from Philly to Honolulu to be let down AGAIN so I cancelled everything. I should have a 6 year old and a 1 month old right now. I’m so traumatized from losing the baby and how this son of a bitch treated me that I started cutting myself again and I’ve been drinking a lot. I can’t go a few hours without a drink. The only “sleep” I’ve been getting since September 16th is when I pass out drunk. On top of that, I had a lot of medical issues to this day since my 2nd miscarriage but I’ve had it. I cancelled all upcoming doctors appointments and cancelled all of my counseling appointments. If I cut myself too deep or if I drink too much, good! I’m not going to do anything to stop the bleeding. I’ve had it.