So my SO and I have been actively ttc'n for about 4 months now. Been together for 9 yrs and never used protection but I have irregular periods. I thought maybe joining this and keeping track would be helpful to me. But so far it's been pretty discouraging. August I started using pre-seed and fertility vitamins and the most I got out of them were high hormones, I cried easily, I peed alot due to the vitamins making me more thirsty I assumed, but I had all the pregnancy symptoms there... my period came a week early then expected and my body just seemed so out of wack so in September I stopped taking them. I didn't log a whole lot since my period and stayed off of here for the most part because I started to obsess over every little detail my body was doing. I want a baby so bad but I almost believe my body isn't capable and god just doesn't want me to become a mother. My SO and I have everything together, we're not some crazy relationship that leaves and fights all the time. He's my everything as I am his. Everyone else around us is popping out kids left and right and most of them we know are drug addicts, no jobs, struggling just to survive and yet here we are perfectly capable of love and financial support for a child and have a huge empty house that we bought 3 years ago and only been able to fill it with puppy barks instead of a child's laughter. I don't understand. Unfortunately as well, in May our insurance policy renewed without notice due to a company change and I can not re enroll until November. That is when I will finally make that appt to be seen. Just don't understand why. Why can others do it so easily.... I'm so full of confusion and questions on what I am doing wrong when all it seems is I'm doing everything right... guess we'll just have to wait to see what the doc says which I'm sort of scared to find out. This past month I did try and bd on and off every other day as much as we could, especially during my fertile week which was just this past week so maybe, just maybe we did it right this time... I don't make it a chore for my hubbs. He knows and wants one as well if it happens. I just try to help mark the day and just have fun with it so there's no pressure on him... his younger brother has had 2 this year, with 2 different women unfortunately, but they both thought maybe it was their genes but that's not the issue anymore... just so tired ya know... sorry for the long blog. If u read this far thanks for reading my rant and I wish the best of luck and baby dust to all of u ladies out there trying...