I wanna use a strap on but not on my bf

Brooklynn • I'm 18. I've been in a relationship (long distance) for 16 months with a military guy who is 20.
So I would LOVE to use a strap on (like the thought really turns me on) and I wanna make a guy my bitch but it can't be my boyfriend... Idk what the deal is but I get turned off by the thought of it being him or him even watching. Suggestions?