Do you think having a baby (children in general) affected your relationship is a positive way or negative?

Question

Basically do you think it caused a strain on your relationship or did it make your bond stronger? 
Basically all of my friends who have kids say it changed everything but only some seem to have been affected negatively and others positively. So I am just curious! Thanks!

Answer

I feel like it’s complicated. Having a kid expands your relationship in (hopefully positive) ways but the fact of the matter is you will have a LOT less time for each other, which kind of has a negative effect. That being said, relationships grow stronger from going through hard things so even though it changes your relationship and you have to adjust, you can come out better for it. But I would never recommend having kids to a couple who’s already struggling because it will  likely NOT be a positive thing for the relationship.

Answer

Negative at first. It’s a HUGE adjustment and you need to work at your marriage to keep it solid.

Answer

Having kids with my husband brought us closer together. Now we think as a family instead of individually. We did wait until out thirties, have a beautiful home, good jobs, great wages.

Answer

For me, it was negative to our relationship as we didn't get one on one time anymore, I was really sick with our son so during pregnancy I didn't want to do anything which means me staying home all the time while he had a life (yes I was jealous but never felt up to going). Once bub arrived we seemed to grow further apart when I fell pregnant again (bub was only 7mths), 2 young babies plus 2 school aged kids (shared care with my ex) ment I was always tired or busy tending to one of them. Pregnant again (3rd baby in 3yrs) and we're room mates at best. We managed to go out twice this year and rekindle our relationship for a few hours but once home it's just babies babies babies 😔 we love them dearly but they take a lot of time and energy, I put my effort into them instead of our relationship, it seems pointless when hubby shows little interest

Answer

It's a bit of both for us. While yes we are closer, we went through a bunch of rough patches while transitioning to a family of three. I had to become a stay at home mom and balance college (all while dealing with PPD) , my husband had to work extra shifts and couldn't help. We spent less time together and started to forget about who we were as a couple instead of being just parents. After we got over the bumps it's been good. We make time to go on dates, we make time to do family activities, we've learned to budget and my husband has moved up in his position. So for us it kinda did both.

Answer

I don’t think you can make a call positive or negative within the first year. Maybe even longer. Yes it causes strain and introduces new challenges. But if you give it time for both of you to adjust, I think you come out stronger. At least that’s been the case for my marriage.

Answer

We have good days and we have not so good days. We’ve also been together 15 years and ttc for 6 years with 2 losses. So it take a lot more than the stress of babies to wreck what we’ve built together. 💕

Answer

If the relationship is good and strong going into it then I think positive overall. If it is already a relationship with issues than a baby will just make it way worse.

Answer

For us it brought us even closer. It forces us to communicate more and it definitely made us a stronger couple.

Do you think having a baby (children in general) affected your relationship is a positive way or negative?

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