Is it wrong to not give money?

Question

On Friday we're invited to my husband's aunts birthday party. She's turning 55. She has asked for money for her birthday. I don't feel comfortable giving grown ups money for their birthday, it just feels wrong to me. Especially since I don't know how much they expect to get? We don't have a lot and are expecting our second baby in a few months. But I think my main problem is that she is a hoarder. Like a true one. Her house is full of stuff and she recently bought a barn to keep even more stuff in. It's already full. Now she's a grown up and I can't dictate how she's living her life, but I'm afraid by giving her money we'll just contribute to her hoarding issues. Would it be rude of us to get her a nice bottle of wine instead? She really loves wine. What would you do?

Answer

I personally think it’s ridiculous for a grown ass woman to ask for any present to begin with. She’s turning 55 not 12 lol She’s an adult she should be happy with a party and family there to celebrate. Get her wine or nothing! She doesn’t need money to hoard more shit.

Answer

What kind of grown person actually expects gifts from everybody on her birthday. From close family/Significant other yes but I would never expect it and definitely wouldn't say give me cash. That's tacky as hell.

Answer

Omg...how trashy to dictate what someone gets you for your birthday smh 🤦🏻‍♀️ and especially to ask for money wow. If you’re feeling generous sure get her wine otherwise I wouldn’t even go

Answer

idk... I think it’s kind of weird that you think it’s weird for an adult to prefer cash over mysterious gifts.
if you know she likes wine, sure get her a cheap bottle of wine and stick a $10 or $20 bill to it or something... I just think it’s weird that you think adults wouldn’t enjoy or appreciate or utilize some extra cash especially around a birthday.

Answer

I'd give her the money as she asked. She obviously has no need for anything else if she's a hoarder, maybe she wants to save to go for a spa day or something.

Answer

She's a hoarder, with a bunch of stuff, and you want to get her some random thing that she doesn't want to add to her problem? 
She wants money. She's an adult capable of knowing what she wants. She already has a crapload of stuff. Give her the money, even just $20. That will be better spent than random junk she didn't ask for

Answer

I think it's weird for adults to be asking for any sort of gift. I always bring a token gift to a birthday thing. A bottle wine would be fine.

Answer

I think it’s tacky to ask for money but I also feel if that’s what she wants just give her something even if only $20. I think it’s strange to give wine when she asked for cash even if it is a little tacky.

Answer

Maybe she has some hardships and needs the money, i would give her money if that's what she wants.  Just $10 or so is fine

Answer

No it’s not wrong I wouldn’t. Not only is it super tacky to ask for gifts it’s even more tacky to expect money from people.

Is it wrong to not give money?

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