Unloved and Unwanted

Friends... tell me what to do. I am hurting so bad.

My husband and I have been married for 2.5 years, and we have a baby on the way. For the last year, he has not touched me unless I have touched him first. I initiate every kiss, every hug, even sex. I always say "I love you" first. When I do initiate sex, he always says to me "I guess we can..." super unexcitedly. On top of that, when we have sex, he is super quiet and always looks bored. He says that he enjoys it and find me attractive, but his actions don't match his words. Sometimes I ask him to do things to my body that really wouldn't take that much effort from him during sex, but would make it more pleasant for me, and he will usually not do it. It feels like he just wants to get it over with. He wants us both to cum as quick as possible so that he can move on.

I have tried talking about it, but he doesn't seem to think there's any problem with the way things are. I walk around the house naked, he looks up, nods, and looks back down. I buy new lingerie, he notices and does nothing. I grind up on him, he walks away. I've made sandwiches for him, cooked meals, kept the house clean, I swallow, I am respectful, I do everything I can think to do. All of those things are by MY CHOICE.

Sometimes when he talks about the future, he talks about it like the baby and I are not a part of it. Whenever I talk about it, I say "we" "us" and I talk about the baby. He talks about it with "me" and "I" and "my house."

We both wanted this baby. We both wanted to get married. I have not cheated or done anything to lose his affection.

Sometimes when I drive somewhere I hope that something bad will happen. Just bad enough to scare him. But then I think that he probably wouldn't care.

Help. How do you win back the love of a man who doesn't love you?

EDIT**

The two comments I have gotten so far are kinda hard to accept but I think you two may be right. It has been a long time since I did stuff just for me. I do a lot for him. Maybe it's overkill. I don't want to smother him.